Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Love is

So, here's the deal. Ian and I will be married on the 28th of this month.
Whether I trip halfway down the aisle, or he stumbles while saying his vows.
Whether we actually get these silly invitations out or we're stuck with Facebook and phone calls.
Whether his family is feuding or not.
Whether my family even shows up.
Whether or not we can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

The sweet arms of Jesus are wide open for us no matter what trivial things come our way...and we still have hearts filled with love when the day is over anyway. So why worry anymore? I know, I know. It sounds easier than it is.

When the day is over, and when the weekend is over...when the weeks and months and days and years go by, when they are over...this party, this celebration doesn't even matter in the scheme of it all. All that matters is the covenant we are making with each other, under God. What else and who else matters without God, and without our commitment and love for Him and each other?

Who is going to wipe my tears when I cry or pick me up after I slip (ungracefully, might I add) on the icy porch stairs and still tell me I'm beautiful? When I'm forgetful and leave the refrigerator door open, or leave my phone on the hood of the car when it's storming outside; when I put a red shirt in the laundry with all of his socks and turn them pink; even when I forget dinner, or worse, I burn his dinner; who is going to forgive me and tell me it's all okay?

Ian is.
Love is.


Tuesday, April 23, 2013


Every once in awhile, the Lord brings things to my attention that I feel must be expressed to some sort of audience. This is a note from my old Facebook that I felt compelled to bring back and repost. Fellowship...what is it?

Dictionary.com (oh ho ho, I'm official!!) defines 'fellowship' like this:

   [fel-oh-ship] , verb, -shipped or -shiped, -ship·ping or -ship·ing.
the condition or relation of being a fellow: the fellowship ofhumankind.
friendly relationship; companionship: the fellowship of father and son.
community of interest, feeling, etc.
communion, as between members of the same church.
an association of persons having similar tastes, interests,etc.
a company, guild, or corporation.
Education .
the body of fellows  in a college or university.
the position or emoluments of a fellow  of a college oruniversity, or the sum of money he or she receives.
a foundation for the maintenance of a fellow  in a collegeor university.
–verb (used with object)
to admit to fellowship, especially religious fellowship.
–verb (used without object)
to join in fellowship, especially religious fellowship.
Use fellowship in a Sentence

1150–1200; Middle English felaweshipe. See fellow, -ship

2.  comradeship, camaraderie, friendship, society, intimacy. 

What really catches me is the synonyms at the end, especially 'friendship' and 'intimacy'.

We, as Christians use the term 'fellowship' often...but do we TRULY think about what it means? Fellowship completes us in our faith...in Paul's first letter to the Corinthians, we have been told how God himself calls us to share fellowship with His Son. The grace we receive as Christians comes from our belief in the Truth and the fellowship we share. One of Paul’s huge messages, laid out in the New Testament, is that when we gather as Christians together, wonderful things happen.

That being said, I'm coming back to those synonyms...the thing that really caught me and brought me to write this. When you think of friendship...what do you think of? Often times, we call aquaintances 'friends', but when we truly mean it, we are talking about people we've had conversations with, at least more than once. And intimacy? When I think of intimacy, I think of closeness, a true bond. 

In too many of the youth groups/college ministries/churches etc. I've gone to, I've run across the same problem that I've been noticing as of late:

I don't think that anyone but three or four people in each of these groups (of the, how many on average? Like...30?) could tell you how long I've been in a relationship with Christ, who I live with, what town I live in, what church I go to...

Is that the ground on which friendship stands upon? I think not! Now, don't take this note as anything for what it isn't, I am merely using myself as an example. I am not any higher or mightier than you because I'm actually saying something about it...because honestly, we're all guilty of pretty much the same stuff, when it all comes down to it.

I have heard the same feedback from others in every ministry I've ever been involved in, like my whole life...whether you realize it or not...

Honestly, I think THAT right there is the thing that needs to be going through your mind every time you approach your social situations, especially at Merge, Relevant, First Baptist, Dayton, Riverside, Crossroads, wherever you attend church and other ministries. You have no idea how much a simple conversation can really brighten a person's day, even someone you'd never think was lonely, and truly aid them in seeking the Lord. Maybe it sounds silly...but as a Christian (who is supposed to be reflecting Jesus, not that I always succeed), extending friendship to others can be the prime example of what they're seeking and what their looking for...because isn't Jesus our truest friend? :)

I encourage all of you to pray about this, no matter where you are from, what groups/church you attend...because this is important stuff! 

I love you all, God BLESS you if you read this :)


Monday, April 22, 2013

Healing begins here.

She can’t help but to look at him
With a shattered heart
If it was only just for fun
Why’d it break her apart?

He whispered “You’re beautiful”
As she gave him her all
Then he threw her aside
And she watched herself fall

Spiraling downward with time,
She watched him move on
Tell me, if it was only just for fun,
Why did it feel so wrong?

To keep it real, I know the feeling,
It’s not simple, and hurts a lot.
Because your body makes a promise
Whether you do, or not.

She’s left feeling empty
He’s left for someone else
It’s left up to her now
She hides the pain up on a shelf

As she paints a mental picture
Of her perfect hiding place
She doesn’t know that the Greatest Artist
Wants to repaint her soul with the color of grace.

She keeps pushing it away,
The thought that there’s a Creator
She wonders if He’s really there,
Then why does everybody hate her?

She says “If God really loves me,
Why can’t I get a break?
Why can’t I show my face?
Why don’t I want to be awake?”

God created you to be loved.
Not to be used by some guy’s lust.
Not to be an object of man,
but rather an instrument of His, if you trust.

He will make your life complete
When you place all the broken pieces before Him.
It won’t always be easy,
I know your emotions are worn thin.

God made himself vulnerable
So the vulnerable could be healed.
Jesus drank all of our sin on the cross
If anyone, He KNOWS how you feel.

He says, go and sin no more.
I've got you in my hand
Mercy is yours,
You're in the arms of the Lamb.

He has heard your prayer.
He has seen your tears.
Don’t you worry, He will heal you.
And take away all of your fears.


I have decided, after a sort of writer's block, followed by lots of thought and prayer, that I'd be taking this blog into a new direction. Instead of stories with topics, posted on a set schedule, I will be posting poems and even stories sometimes, as I feel lead to do so. I still hope you guys will enjoy riding with me on this journey. God bless all of you.